When it comes to dating your heart has to be in love with you first. Loving yourself first is essential to opening up the heart to others.
The heart has many functions that are key to a body being healthy and strong. Chances are if you have a "broken heart" it needs time to heal. Only when the heart is in love with the body that houses it will it truly be ready to support another heart.
Meeting the love of your life and having a successful "heart centered" relationship takes place only when your heart is whole and happy. There are 14 moving parts to your heart connecting to the brain. The heart works for the body in many ways and if it is not a “healthy heart” be it in mind, body or soul then it needs some love and attention. The only person that can heal your heart is you.
In order to have a healthy heart there are key elements to keeping it functioning at its best. If you are struggling with a “broken heart” it’s not a healthy heart and there are things that you can do to help heal it. Have you heard the term “he/she died from a broken heart”? I am sure you have and although I would not put dying from a broken heart at a high percentage, there certainly is some truth to that saying. I am sure we all know someone who has been said to have died from a broken heart. While I am sure that some of you reading this can relate to the pain of a broken heart, I am also confident that all of you can take the necessary steps towards healing your broken heart.
Good news – a broken heart can be fixed. Here are a few suggestions to helping you heal your broken heart. Get centered, what I mean by that is, be aware of how you are feeling, allow the emotions to fill your heart. It’s okay to be sad and broken – it’s normal. Like anything it is going to take some time to heal and fix what is broken. Your broken heart is no exception and if you don’t take the time to heal it, you will keep repeating the same pattern over. It’s not a quick fix and cannot be replaced easily – just ask anyone on a waiting list for a new heart.
Whether it’s a broken heart or a broken femur, the amount of healing depends on the severity of the fracture. If you rush the healing process, you risk that the fracture may sustain another injury, in turn prolonging the outcome necessary to continue the journey towards finding love. Take the time to mend your broken heart.
After you have allowed the pain of your broken heart to grieve it is time to start the healing process. Change your routines, get active, move that body and allow yourself the time to feel that beating heart from a different perspective. Be aware of your pounding heart through the physical healing process, that’s when the mental healing begins. There are not too many hearts that don’t love to get pumped up! Feel what it feels like to be alive in your body, filter out the negative chatter and push through the thoughts that keep you stuck under your protective covers. Find a buddy to play with, you don’t have to be a child to play in a park, swim in a pool, ride a bike, take a walk, join a team or make new friends. By doing these things you will be opening up your heart to a world of new opportunities.
Here are a few suggestions on how to heal your broken heart. The heart is connected to the brain and our emotions. You may have felt this happening when you are in a state of panic or you feel an attraction or love for another. Maybe it’s remembering something that made you feel happy or when you are feeling sad. When you are feeling these different emotions you will notice that fear and sadness increases the hearts rate and when we feel love and happiness our heart feels calmer and at ease. There are ways to be cognisant of these emotions and to practice communicating with the brain and heart.
Here are some things that I have learned to help calm my heart.
- Use your brain to think about how your heart is beating and imagine that you are breathing in and out through it (visualize your breath coming in and out through the center of your chest.).
- Focus on making the in-breath and the out-breath about the same length – count by 4 (one and two and three and four) keep repeating this chant.
- When you feel like you have a consistent rhythm going, think happy thoughts, engage your brain with your heart and you will notice a sense of calming -- a happy feeling.
- Practice this method at least twice per day for about ten minutes per session, and more often if you are under severe stress.
- Pay attention to how this makes you feel after each session, it gets easier the more you practice and hopefully it becomes a part of your daily routine.
I promise that if you push your heart to beat hard and fast again, you will be ready to receive another healthy heart. With loving kindness I encourage you to focus on your heart center, write what it feels like to have a broken heart. Allow yourself time to heal, be aware and ready for your heart to soar back into the flow of receiving the gift of another heart -- a vibrant strong healthy heart.